The L word - Episode 210 - "Land Ahoy"

I found this weeks episode just a bit cheesy.... - Basically an "Olivia Cruise" commercial gone wrong. But if anything, it should've at least made all those out there who incessantly bitch about The L word not showing enough real Lesbo content extremely happy. Shiver me britches you coulda swabbed the deck with all that authentic dykish charm.
But I digress.....
Right off the bat we are subjected to more "Betty" action - One minute Amy Ziff is playing the Cello, next minute she is having some obscene tit-squishing hot-tub "I'm The King Of the World" Sex with an "Orgasm expert" named Phoebe Sparkle, who turns out to be on a women's sex "panel" with Dana aboard this particular cruise. So of course Alice is there, and the twisted threesome of Shane, Carmen and Jenny tag along as well. Jenny, knowing all about the kitchen love confession, (from last weeks episode) spends the whole cruise slightly off her rocker trying to persuade Carmen and Shane to get it on in her trademark mentally cryptic way. Of course, the "I Sleep With a Different Woman Everyday Sexpert" immediately hones in on Shane and asked her to have a drink. A short time later Shane is throwing her down on the bed, they have a brief exchange over who is going to top who.... Phoebe Sparkles yawns and Shane asks to sleep on her couch. - I guess the whole angle with Ms. Sparkles was to prove that even a "sexpert" and a "sexfiend" need a night off once in a while. OK then.
The only great part of the Cruise sequence was a scene where Alice and Dana do a bit of "Love Boat" Role Play - Wonderful as it was, got somewhat ruined by that absolutely annoying background music bullshit going "We're on the LEZ BOAT...Lala LEZ BOAT" OK then.
So that's where things get more serious. The Bette and Tina situation seems to be turning the corner when Bette is invited to an awards ceremony honoring Tina, by none other than Hell-in-a-pea-body. At the Gala, with both "B" and "T" looking absolutely ravishing, Tina casually asks Bette, - still glowing from their mad-lovin from last episode - that they should start "dating" because, and I quote, - she and Helena are "not exclusive". I have a sneaking suspicion that Hell-in-a-handbasket won't be too happy with that revelation.
As far as Kit goes, I have completely lost interest in her storyline with Benjamin Bradshaw, but in this episode Bette and Kit's father (the late Ossie Davis) comes into town and meets up with the happy adulterous couple and continues to ignore the fact of Bette's love life. Deeply hurt, she hits the wall and lets dear ol' Daddy have it. He still remains a stick in the mud, and concludes the scene by keeling over at Dinner wit Kit and Benjamin. Kit phones Bette who must leave the awards ceremony just as Tina gets up on stage. The first thing "T" does is look over to see her love in the audience, but cannot hide her disappointment to find her ex-wife's seat empty.

FLASH TO SHENNY'S LOVE PALACE, where Mark is busy taking down the "rapey" cameras just as the girls walk in. Jenny hands over the incriminating "love confession" tape to Shane and Carmen. Shane stands there stunned, Mark awaits her wrath, and Carmen runs after a weeping Jenny to make some lame excuse, and then takes off after slamming the video into Mark's chest. Shane starts to stew as she sees that most of the titles of the movie footage contain her name. Obviously deeply upset she proceeds to punch Mark in the face, throws one of the camera's against the wall, and with tears in her eye's the scene cuts to black and the credits roll.
Whoa!....Next weeks episode is going to be heavy......